I was in the market yesterday and I found myself surrounded by black women; two stood behind me, one in front and the cashier. Something told me to pull out my card and speak to them about our hair. So I did. I told them that I was a writer, I would love it if they read my site and that I my focus topics are health, wellness and black women’s hair.
The woman in front of me just looked at me like I was crazy. The woman directly behind me moved up to my right and we spoke briefly. I told her my theory that our hair is seasonal. I think it is a futile effort to try to straighten any hair with even a lil kinky curl to it during the summer months. The humidity is just too much. This is the time for twists, sets, braids and wild styles.
Then I got in on the over processing. It is so out of control. I had a similar conversation with a woman in the mosque this past Sunday. She flat out lied to me and told me her hair was real. I didn’t even ask her, she just volunteered the lie. In retrospect, much about that being was not real. Eyelashes, eye color, only God knows what else.
Black women hate their own hair. That is just so said to me. They burn it off with chemicals. Then they go buy fake hair; synthetic or from a woman of another ethnicity and glue or sew it into their heads. It’s not even close to attractive. I know they know they are not fooling anyone. Clearly, this is not real.
There is a movement happening. I don’t know when it started. I hope it never ends. There are sisters out there who have put there foot down and removed themselves from the cycle of abuse.
We have to stop believing that our hair is bad. Two of the women in the market told me my hair was nice because I have a good grade of hair. I had to inform the first that I work at this and the second that that was flat out bullshit. It’s one of many excuses you are using to sic yourself out. I don’t know if you’re lazy or if you just don’t get it. Whose scale are we being graded on?
My hair is fabulous because I found the rhythm to its care.
My journey has been challenging. When I was younger I could get so frustrated with it that I would cry. I was clueless. But I learned many things from many sources. I am proud to say: “I got it now.”
Everyone’s wellness is a personal journey. Everything doesn’t apply to everyone. It’s not about the tactics. It is about keeping your curiosity alive until you find the way that works for you.
No matter who you are or what style you rock you have to maintain your natural mane.